hamstercult -- we don't play to trends...on tuesday.

"Two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity. And I'm not sure about the universe." -Albert Einstein

Sure, there's a lot of great things about the holiday season. People show the true goodness of their hearts during the last few months of the year. Of course, people also use the holidays to show just how dumb they can be.

Let's take, for example, one of the hottest trends of the 2005 holidays -- the upside-down Christmas Tree. It's an artificial tree, that's intentionally upside-down.

No joke. And these things are selling like crazy, for hundreds of dollars. It's enough to make somebody want to tear out their hair.

However, at hamstercult.com, that's an opportunity to think -- and capitalize.

If Christmas trees can be popular upside-down, what else could be? So here are a few possibilities of products that could be the next big upside-down trend. The actual forecasted chance of a product becoming an upside-down trend are graded on a standard 17-point system, with 1 being extremly unlikely, 17 being very likely, and 12 being a number between 1 and 17.

Here's the short list. Have any more suggestions? E-mail them in!

PROBABLE PRODUCT #1: THE UPSIDE-DOWN CEILING FAN!!

Easy on the eyes (since most of the light will now being going upward), the upside-down ceiling fan can deliver that same reliable cooling. It can now even be installed on the floor if the consumer so desires.

CHANCES IN REALITY: 11. Looks cool, but floor installation of an upside-down ceiling fan could be murder on ankles everywhere.

PROBABLE PRODUCT #2: THE UPSIDE-DOWN UMBRELLA!!

Ergonomic design offers maximum visual impact. Water collected can be used as temporary rubber ducky habitat.

CHANCES IN REALITY: 4. Will sell great in Seattle, but not enough drier climate market to keep investors happy. To be forever in legend next to the Urban Sombrero.

PROBABLE PRODUCT #3: THE UPSIDE-DOWN PRINCE!!

Hey, if the guy can work on enslaving the world through subliminal chemical impulses in his music, he can do whatever the hell he wants. Unless he causes a ninja to flip out.

CHANCES IN REALITY:

PROBABLE PRODUCT #4: THE UPSIDE-DOWN CELL PHONE

Everybody and their mother knows that cell phone sales do not rely on actual functionality or power. The cell phone is 110 percent about trends. That's the only reason anything like a Sidekick could ever become popular. It's like holding a freakin' Sega Game Gear against your cheek. So with the upside-down trend coming, expect this within a week of whenever you read this.

CHANCES IN REALITY: 16. Yes, I think people are that stupid.